Hi there!
I was wondering if there is possibly anyone interested in reading lyrics of one of my songs. Any opinion on the text itself or its correctness (grammar, vocabulary) is welcome!

(I can offer you more of such stuff in case of favourable response.  )

RED CAT

Once I came to the Lord
and saw His brand-new painting
There was no flaming sword
There was no pious king

There was a red cat
with dark eyes
There was a red cat
with sight that flies

I dared to say:
ˮOh, my Master
I’d like to see
Oh, my great Master
could You please explain it to me
I wish for nothing
but the truth which’s bald
What is she called?“

And the Creator hesitated for a while
(not that He wouldn’t tell me, though, I think)
and then, with a kind of smile,
said, having offered me some supernal drink
(‘cause Adonai
can’t lie):

ˮAll the names
of the Cat ring
in the space
which’s lost its borders
and her fame’s
at times an odd thing
she’s a maze
destroying orders…“

Sometime later that life
I paid Him another visit
saw just finished Lot’s wife
and Solomon’s Temple with all that’s exquisite
but there was not the red cat
anywhere to be seen
There was no red cat
What does it mean?

ˮOh, my Master
I’d like to see
Oh, my good Master
could You please explain it to me?
Was it stolen from Thee?“

But He just shrugged:
ˮI set her free…“

ˮI know I’m not allowed
to doubt
but didn’t the picture do You proud?“
Well, I dared not say it aloud
yet he replied there crying out:
ˮNo-one could ever’ve bought it!
Could you ever’ve bought it?!“

But still

All the names
of the Cat ring
in the space
which’s lost its borders
and her fame’s
at times an odd thing
she’s a maze
destroying orders

All the names
of the Cat ring
in the space
which’s lost its order
and her fame’s
at times quite an odd thing
she’s a maze
lacking any border
amazing maze
with no border…

Do you have music for it? I think people will be more interested if they will hear it 

Here you are:
http://bandzone.cz/frantakbartak

Have you found any mistakes so far? Cause I have.